There will be a time this winter when you're shoveling snow off of your driveway while freezing your face off, that your mind will start to wander, and you'll think about missed chances...28 men left on base in three days, multiple opportunites across multiple games  (Do I even need to recap them for you?), and three separate knockout blows being blown in three separate first innings.

That snow will seem a little deeper, and the air will feel a little colder.

There will be a time later this year, probably around the holidays, when you're dragged somewhere to be with people you don't want to be around to have conversations you don't want to have, and you'll start to wear a far-off look as you think about how they could've given up just one f*****g hit for nine innings on that Tuesday back in October, and still lose the damn game.

And lame holiday get-togethers will be a little lamer.

There will be a day in the coming months when summer couldn't seem further off, when afternoon will look like night, and suddenly the agony will creep in again and you'll punch a steering wheel thinking about Cueto's oblique, or you'll kick one of those lame plastic Santas in anger over Rolen's error, or the guy in line in front of you doing his Christmas shopping will look at you quizically as you openly wonder about something Dusty did months before.

Winter will look darker and summer will feel even more distant.

This is going to be a long offseason.

The greatest chokejob in Cincinnati sports history is complete.  And to be clear, what the Reds did was indeed a chokejob.  As much as I truly loved watching and following this team this season, I can't of a more gentle way to put it.  And among the most difficult things we're left to deal with are how systematic a collapse this really was and how it will be forever before the Reds can make good on it.

There's no need in pointing the finger in one direction.  Everyone failed.  At least everyone not named "Homer."  Dusty Baker will take some heat, and maybe he'll take the fall too.  Undoubtedly, his work in this series deserve scrutiny and criticism - namely the lack of urgency he managed with in the fifth and sixth innings - but Dusty himself didn't lose this series.  He had plenty of help.

If game one was a great team victory, games three through five fit ther very definition of "team losses."  Pick a Red and I can name for you a moment when he failed to deliver.  Pick a moment, and I can name for you a Red who failed to deliver in it.

I have a feeling we'll be doing both for a while.

But the really cruel part is that this fall's failure won't loom for a few days and go away. It will be discussed, dissected, revisited, and debated nearly every time the Reds make news.

Think we won't be thinking about the blown chances with two men on base while waiting in autograph lines with our kids at RedsFest?  Do you really believe players won't be answering questions about what they didn't do at the end of this season when they reconvene to prepare for the next one?  And as good as the Reds may be next year, and the nucleus of a 97-win team will be back, you know that the question of how the Reds avoid being haunted by memories of 2012's meltdown will be heard loudly and often.

This isn't going away soon.

I hate that it ended this way.  I hated having to talk about it on the radio this afternoon (I began by being honest.  My first words: "I've been doing this for a long time.  This is the first time I've begun a show by not knowing what to say.)  And I hate having to write about this.  I loved this team and I loved this season.  If you'll allow me to be personal for a second, watching the Reds this season and having games to look forward to this summer kept me sane during some very difficult times in my life. 

I have literally dozens of awesome memories of watching this team.

It's just hard to think of them right now.

Right now, we deal with the cold reality of a long winter filled with agonizing reflections of three of the most painful days in Cincinnati sports history. 

The pain will go away, but it's going to be a while.

A long while.